Anthony J. Crowley - Good Omens

[onlyanapple]

Comments

[mydear]

I'm certain it wasn't the politeness. It was the other person not respecting it that was the problem.

[ Because how could anyone being polite be at all irritating? He can't even imagine it. ]

... I am quite sure I don't even want to know what bubble tea is.

[onlyanapple]

Ah, of course, the other person's at fault.

[What point is he even arguing any more, he doesn't know. He'll just move on to the other topic, because it's more fun. Did Aziraphale say he didn't want to know? Too bad, he's gonna. The demon marches forward with clear glee.]

Okay! So they take fruit tea, right? And they put it in these little chewy balls, and you suck it through a straw. It's very hip.

[mydear]

I can see no other reason why.

[ Oh, Lor- Someone. His eyes flick over Crowley and his face before he huffs a noise, something frustrated settled over him before he scoffs and tries to make himself comfortable again. ]

I suppose this is the reason you're here? To make me suffer?

[ But he's teasing. ]

[onlyanapple]

Just keeping up with my duties.

[That's bullshit. He hasn't actually kept up his demonic duties with Aziraphale for centuries.]

And anyway, I came to keep you informed of the current fancy tea situation.

[mydear]

I suppose it's acceptable to lie when you're a demon.

[ But he says it with a kind of fondness that comes from being around the other man for a very, very long time. It's probably a bad thing but, really, he can't do much to fight it anymore. ]

Please, in future, keep that sort of information to yourself.

[onlyanapple]

Encouraged, actually.

[Not that he's very good at it, mind. He sniffs haughtily, examining his fingernails.]

I can't make any promises. It might just slip out some time.

[mydear]

[ If he were a slightly more violent angel... ]

Not exactly my forte, my dear.

[ All the same... There's a touch of fondness that overcomes him as he watches the other man. ]

I'm sure you will do admirably.

[onlyanapple]

Of course. Nothing but admirable, me. Ir perhaps the opposite of that.

[He gets up in a swift movement, clapping his hands together.]

So. Are we doing the Ritz?

[mydear]

I don't think either of us are in the mood for a detailed list of your traits, admirable or not, Crowley.

[ Mostly because it would embarrass them both something ridiculous and neither of them are here for that right now, thank you very much. All the same, he pushes himself up with a soft noise. ]

I assume we'll have a table?

[onlyanapple]

We'll have to settle for another time, then.

[He scoffs lightly, flashing Aziraphale a sharp-toothed grin. As if they never have a table.]

Naturally.

[mydear]

I'm sure you'll bring it down on me when I least expect it.

[ And, of course, when it would be most irritating. All the same - ]

We should get on, then. I'll collect my coat.

[onlyanapple]

Of course. It wouldn't be fun any other way.

[The demon moves to head to the door, rolling his eyes goodnaturedly behind his sunglasses. ]

I will never understand why you don't just make one appear. It's so much easier.